some of the national day songs i've been made to memorise way to in school back in the 80s and 90s, are still superbly good songs - lyrics well penned and inspirational, and the tunes not only easy to remember, but popular enough for everyone to hum along. stick in your head.

count on me singapore is probably my personal favourite. i still enjoy singing and humming along to it on public transport, trying to ignore the weird stares i get doing that (hey, at least its not mahjulah singapura). if i just close my eyes to everything else that's happening in singapore and just sing the song as it is, it can really make me cry.

aaah.... that fleeting moment of patriotism, when my eyes are closed ie.

when my eyes open, dick lee's rendition (see video below) seems more befitting, more real. *haha*

oh, and happy national day/public holiday/or whatever that day means to you. ;-)

i remembered being a young dancer 6 yrs ago (gosh! has it been that long?? or longer??) scouring glitterlisa.com for videos to learn from. and that was before there was youtube!

this was one of the first videos i watched. and i remembered telling myself that i wanted to dance like that! =) elegant, clean, a seamless connection and flow of energy with my partner, yet filled with little surprises here and there. the tricks esp used to fascinate me to no end!

viewing the video again after so many yrs, well, feels different. the basic elements i like are still there, but there's a certain something-something that's missing, like a sparkle or an X factor. or perhaps it just looked too rehearsed. the performance could have been a whole lot more exciting just in terms of energy level.

Pushing out barriers to art

part of my on-going reflection on what art is, its meaning and significane to others. this internal discourse that's been churning inside of me for years now, and until recently, found self-expression in the work that i do as well. its a joy (and a burden at times) to be in a job that is an extension of myself.

anyways, i thought this to be an insightful commentary piece stemming from the recent uob painting of the year awards. rather unusual for Straits Times to write commentaries, but perhaps not so much in this particular section of the paper on Saturdays.

____________________________________

Straits Times, 19 July 2008, S14 - Pushing out barriers to art

Controversy has been attached to the artist Joel Yuen's series of photographic prints, showing arrangements of animal parts, which won this year's UOB Painting of the Year. Some, it seems, call it in bad taste. Now, art needn't be controversial, of course. And neither does controversy validate an effort to artistry. Nevertheless, the debate is useful for providing an opportunity to further public openness to what constitutes art. Too often, art is expected to be pretty. (But though Jackson Pollack is hugely admired, his paint splats are surely disturbing to take in; not pretty.) Worse, judgement too often is deferred to the size of the price tag next to the canvas, sculpture, or print. (Yet many artists fail to make money for pieces that are eventually highly regarded. The art didn't change over time, taste had to catch up.)

Contemporary art can be difficult, certainly Mondrian's black-bordered squares and rectangles of colours are hard to appreciate at first. To put it in just a few words, contemporary art gives the narrative and ideas attached a far bigger role than previously in the history of art. What the artist is trying to say - and how - has become very important. Without this, a Rothko canvas might simply be a bunch of fuzzy-edged rectangles of colour. But even without a grounding in art, history - and remember, galleries often provide useful primers - art can still be approached at face value. It evokes an emotional response, and we might be convinced t read up. With a deeper background, our reaction then evolves. Art is, after all, a relationship between the audience and the work.

So while some may be uncomfortable with Mr Yuen's prints, his attempt to make his audience think about animals and consumption, by "taking (animal) parts and putting them together", clearly has sparked engagement with the work. One person who viewed it was quoted in this paper saying: "These photographs ae disgusting... (They) make me very uncomfortable. Even if art is not beautiful, it should not inspire such feelings." But instead, that's precisely it: art draws out emotions, even if sometimes disturbing ones. (Think Francis Bacon's disturbing human forms. or Fang Lijun's bald headshinting at untold stories that you subtly invited to draw out.)

Maybe the debate over Mr Yuen's winning work eventually wlll bring a fresh appreciation of art. This would support many local artists who may not now be readily understoof, from those working in traditional forms to the emerging digital media. The barriers are being pushed out. With luck, more of the public will venture into the space.

i gave the meme i wrote more thought last night, in particular, the "if i were a billionaire" bit. somehow, the vision felt a tad too small. but i think the question's limiting too! =)

i suppose, just supposing, if i had unlimited resources and a good amount of power (money isn't everything), i'd like to:
1) change the way government is run and how countries are managed. most governments either view themselves as i-know-better-than-you and treat their citizens like complete dummies, or give their citizens too much power and themselves too little credit to the point of chaos or inefficiency. if i had money, the resources and power and influence, i'd like to explore how the fine balance could be found. Government was formed to represent their people and work for their best interest, not work against them.
2) overhaul public school systems. i think most public school systems under-estimate the potential of each child, and/or fail to nurture them in the talents they each have. "follow this set syllabus and get past the exams", the schools would say. "when you've completed your formal education, you can do whatever you want". what a load of rubbish. how many dreams have been squelched, potentials forgotten, curiosity and creativity just dummed down for mere mediocrity. when i think about it for my own children (if i have any), i would want the best for them - to learn the ability of inquiry and thoughtful assessment through home-schooling, to be inspired through story-telling as they do in jewish schools, to be fully self-expressed as we see in some of the private schools in Singapore. if every child was raised to be at their fullest, we won't be facing the problems we face today - few young artists, fewer singaporean entrepreneurs, and a general sense of apathy about the society around them.

Totally useless sex fact

No. 37 on Cleo Magazine's 100 Amazing Sex Facts article:

December 22 has been designated Global Orgasm Day, an event conceived to effect
change in the energy field of the Earth through the input of the largest
possible surge of human energy. Participants are to concentrate all their
thoughts on peace during or after orgasm.

Riiiiiggght....... *hahahahahahahahaha*

meme

stealing this from brenda's blog. i realise its actually a great means of self-reflection! =)

10 Years ago I was:
Pre-uni break - temping at a youth voluntary welfare organisation and getting intimately acquainted with the ins and outs of the photocopying machine (hey, even up to today, i'm prob the only person in the office who makes the best attempt at fixing the phtocopier *hah*). and falling asleep in front of my supervisor while trying to take notes at weekly staff meetings. *sheepish look*

5 years ago I was:
at many new beginnings.

Fresh from a trip to Japan and all happy and hopeful about my first boyfriend - a sweet, smart and ambitious American boy who lived and worked in Kobe. He was everything I thought I wanted in a boyfriend and husband.

Was also one of the most exciting points in my career - was part of a pioneer group moved over to set up the new workforce devt agency. Met the boss who would show me the ropes in the field of PR and communications (I wouldn't be this good at my job if it wasn't for her), worked and played mighty hard with a madcap group of colleagues, and made some lifelong friends.

1 year ago I was:
Fresh back from a study trip to London and Paris, and trying to run an international architectural competition for just about the two most important historical buildings in the city!! and with very little help. Although my boss and I made sure the jury members were fed well at each meal so they'd make the right decisions. *heh*

5 Things on my To-Do-list:
Practise my songs for exam!! (I've been lazy), make reservations at Sushi Tei for dinner with Mal & Kelly, sort through my mountain of mail, sew back on the buttons of shirts, and start working on that 3-page committee memo ahead of Monday's submission. Oh, and read that 500 page report in time for next week's meetings. *yikes*

Five Snacks I enjoy:
erhm, I don't snack - like that how??

ok ok, at most (but seldom) - coffee/Nescafe considered? other than that, dried prunes (there's only one brand I eat & can only be found in select supermarkets. everything else is too sweet), preserved plumes, a very specific brand of coffee-chocolate biscuits (can't rem what its called but i rem packaging), Cuppuccino-flavoured Maltesers. - Told you i was fussy!

If I were a Billionaire I would:
Be a domestic goddess like Nigella and have my own super-hot TV show and books! (minus the hefty hips and thunder thighs) the envy of all women and the object of lust for all men. *hehe*

Ok, seriously. Well, first, I'd make sure my family's completed covered - that there's enough money in the pot for them to do whatever they want for the rest of their lives. This includes my parents, my own family unit and my extended family.

Well, then maybe live in a penthouse, have holiday homes overseas for the family to use, be the founder and chairwoman of a number of successful businesses (real estate, communications & marketing, F&B, retail, etc), and then invited as a keynote speaker at important events/business meetings etc. And then at some point, write a book (not nec. auto-biography lah). But I'd also make sure I have time, money and resources to home-school my own children. And have time for my family. Oh, and start amassing an art collection that's actually worth something (method to the madness, rather than just madness). *heh*

Then, I'll start 2 foundations: one for children and youths who have a dream but have no resources to making their passions their careers, eg. to do musical theatre professionally, dance professionally, fashion designer, play tennis, etc - to be a platform that provides them the resources to live their dreams. the second foundation i'll start is a similar one, but for women, especially those who have lived all their lives suppressing their dreams and who they are for their families. Full self-expression for each of these individuals, that's probably the aim. =)

Five people/groups I'd want to have lunch with:
I'm assuming its people I won't get to see under normal circumstances.
My grandparents (mom's side, since they've passed away before I could meet them), my nanny (she passed on before I got to tell her that I loved her more than my own grandma), Barack Obama, Matthew Perry (coz he seems so darn funny!), Ella Fitzgerald (I'd want a voice lesson with her!).

Oooo oooo!! I have more:
- Anthony Bourdain, so he'd actually cook me a gd lunch! *heh*
- Nicolas Serota, Director of Tate Modern (coz I'm in awe of how he's transformed the place - this one still got chance considering where I work *heh*)
- Dostoevsky, author of Crime and Punishment because he is so brilliant a writer (and to scold him for the ending of that book!)
- Francis Ford Coppola, film director because he's such an extraordinary film maker
- the cast of West Wing because they genuinely seem like a really freat & funny team to work with!
- Haruki Murakami, author of Norwegian Wood (this one also still got chance, altho he's supposed to be painfully shy)
-Howard Schultz, founder of Starbucks Corporation because I'd like free coffee for the rest of my life and because I'd really like to work for him.

Five Places I've lived:
This one IS sad - Delta Road, Telok Blangah, Hougang, Tampines, ie SINGAPORE lor.

I stayed in Montpellier, France for 3 weeks on student exchange - does that count??? =P

Five jobs I've had:
Rookie photocopying cum admin girl at a youth welfare organisation, marketing & production bao-ka-liao in a Christian entertainment coy, Pro job fair organiser in the manpower ministry, marketing & communications specialist (i can sell almost anything!) in workforce agency, and biz devt & comms manager for a soon-to-be national art institution.

can i just say i'm in complete AWE of this installation art piece from palais de tokyo?? its absolutely wicked!

its what i always dreamed i'd do in my former workplace with cheap walmart darth vader masks!! *muahahahaaaa*

never in my life did i ever imagine myself singing rock. but i am, and am lovin' it too. it gave me my chest voice - finally!!

i really didn't expect it - but the more i sing it, the more i identify with the emotions in this song, and the more energy i can give to this one moment. feels absolutely fantastic.

___________________________

Torn
- Natalie Imbruglia

I thought I saw a man brought to life
He was warm, he came around like he was dignified
He showed me what it was to cry

Well you couldn't be that man I adored
You don't seem to know, don't seem to care, what your heart is for
I don't know him anymore
There's nothing where he used to lie
Conversation has run dry
That's what's going on
Nothing's fine
I'm torn

I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
You're a little late
I'm already torn

So I guess the fortune teller's right
I should have seen just what was there and not some holy light
But you crawled beneath my veins and now
I don't care I have no luck
I don't miss it all that much
There's just so many things
That I can' touch
I'm torn

I'm all out of faith this is how I feel

I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor

Illusion never changed into something real

I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn

You're a little late

I'm already torn

There's nothing where he used to lie
My inspiration has run dry
That's what's going on
Nothing's right I'm torn

I'm all out of faith this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed bound and broken on the floor
You're a little late
I'm already torn.

Art

"An old silent pond. / Into the pond a frog jumps. / Spalsh! Silence again." It is perhaps the best known of all Japanese haiku. No subject could be more humdrum. No language could be more pedestrian. Basho, the poet, make no comment on what he is describing. He implies no meaning, message, or metaphor. He simply inites our attention to no more and no less than just this: the old pond in is watery stillness, the kerplunk of the frog, the gradual return of the stillness.

In effect he is putting a frame around the moment, and what the frame does is enable us to see not just something about the moment but the moment itself in all its ineffable ordinariness and particularity. The chances are that if we had noticed a thing or, noticing it, wouldn't have given it a second thought. But the frame sets it off from everything else that distracts us. It makes possible a second thought. That is the nature and purposes of frames. The frame does not change the moment, but it changes our way of perceiving the moment. It makes us NOTICE the moment and tha is what Basho wants above all else. It is what literature in general wants above all else too.

From the simplest lyric to the most complex novel and densest drama, literature is asking us to pay attention. Pay attention to the frog. Pay attention to the west wind. Pay attention to the boy on the raft, the lady in the tower, the old man on the train. In sum, pay attention to the world and all that dwells therein and thereby learn at last to pay attention to yourself and all that dwells therein.

The painter does the same thing, of course. Rembrandt puts a frame around an old woman's face. It is seamed with wrinkles. The upper lip is sunken in, the skin waxy and pale. It is not a remarkable face. You would not look twice at the old woman if you found her sitting across the aisle from you on a bus. But it is a face so remarkably seen that it forces youto see it remarkably just as Cezanne makes you see a howl of apples or Andrew Wyeth's muslim curtain blowing in at an open window. It is a face unlike any other face in all the world. All the faces in the world are in this one old face.

Unlike painters, who work with space, musicians work with time, with note following note as second follows second. Listen! says Vivaldi, Brahms, Stravinsky. Listen to this time that I have framed between the first note and the last and to these sounds in time. Listen to the way the silence is broken into uneven lengths between the sounds and to the silences themselves. Listen to the scrape of bow against gut, the rap of the stick against the drumhead, the rush of breath through reed and wood. The sounds of the earth are like music, the old song goes, and the sounds of music are also like the sounds of the earth, which is of course where music comes from. Listen to the voices outside the window, the ning in the kitchen sink. Learn to listen to the music of your own lengths of time, your own silences.

Literature, painting, music - the most basic lesson that all art teaches us is to stop, look, and listen to life on this planet, including our own lives, as a vastly richer, deeper more mysterious business than most of the time it ever occurs to us to suspect as we bumble along from day to day on automatic pilot. In a world that for the most part steers clear of the whole idea of holiness, art is one of the few places left where we can speak to each other of holy things.

- Frederick Buechner

in the wee small hours of the morning
while the whole wide world is fast asleep
i lie awake and think about the boy
and never ever think of counting sheep.

when my lonely heart has learnt its lesson
i'd be his if only he would call
in the wee small hours of the morning
that's the time i miss him the most of all.

every now and then, I remember what this song means to me. just every now and then.